no more living hard, fresh eggs everyday

Oops I went online to “take a break from life” and write about it on here instead, but I had left up a bunch of shop managery stuff I had been doing from last night so, me being me, ended up jumping right back into it.  It’s too much fun.

STARTING YESTERDAY:

Friday night I came home, feeling so tired even after leaving work an hour early (yay) that I had to resist sleep in the car.  (I wasn’t driving, naturally.)  I had a nap at like 9pm.

It was Friday night, so when 11 o’clock hit and my husband was home from running errands and visiting friends, I started to…

  • say hello all over town
  • become more classic
  • utilize my ice-maker
  • have a couple of drinks boys

And, well, a few Pepskis later I was wide awake and excited about life.  First I took dear husband to the barn with me so I could admire my chickons.  A skunk tried to attack us on the way to the barn but we outran the jerk.  I moved some of the eggs to the birdcage, counted the chickens, and admired the pretty eggs and pets.  I think there were seven or eight eggs in the birdcage.  I found another egg in a frankly stupid spot from my barred rocka’ Zebby so I took that home with me to become the 18th and hopefully final egg in my incubator.

At home I spread out a bunch of old work files over my kitchen table, turned up the oi! music, and tried to go through old orders, create calendars and charts, and just general work tidy-up shit.

I took a break from organizing.  I brought out my two sweet hamsters, Officer Hammy and Ursula.  Officer Hammy isn’t actually my hamster, though, he belongs to my son but I take care of him mostly.  Especially when my son isn’t home.

And if it wasn’t ridiculously fucking clear from the Pepskis and naps and midnight barn walks, my son wasn’t home, he was having a sleep-over elsewhere.  Actually a double sleep-over, as he isn’t here right meow either.

Anyways, back to Officer Hammy and Ursula’s date.  They seem to get along relatively alright.  Officer Hammy can be a little rude at times, just with his pushiness, but Ursula has no problems telling him to fuck off (she squeaks) and he respects that.  So they played together for a while, and Ursula very badly wanted to do more than play, as did Officer Hammy, but unfortunately I’ve never seen an animal so incompetent at what should be a natural instinct as Officer Hammy is.  It’s not for lack of trying, either, he just can’t seem to understand the process.  Poor Officer Hammy, and even poorer Ursula.  But their date ended on a good note anyways, as I gave them treats and they had fun eating food together.  A few times one of them tried to steal the other ham’s treat and they’d chase each other around.  In short, they were cute af.

After that I went back to tattoo shop stuff.  Lots of writing to do, I explored a bunch of places I can order products from (hair dye flies off the shelves and I don’t think we have a consistent distributor).  I started to write my weekly summary for the staff to read but I started to get way too carried away with quoting rap lyrics (I had switched from oi! to rap to make the mood better for the hamsters) that I had to give that a break.

I remembered that my mom had mentioned that Chelsea-Ann (her dog) seemed interested in our shed in the backyard.  There is a big gap underneath the shed.

Two things just popped into my mind: my first two cats, Bella & Ben, were born under my grandmother’s shed.
Secondly, sadly, that my favourite chicken Hetty’s body is still in the shed as she died when the ground was frozen.

Regardless, all I was thinking then was that there might be a cat and possibly kittens (lololol I wrote chickens first) — I’m NOT drunk right now, just for the record, I’m pretty much this ridiculous all the time — under the shed.  Also the sun was just starting to rise.  Also I could hear my cocks cockadoodling in the barn!

So I grabbed some wet cat food and a towel and stretched out on my grass.  My feet got cold and wet quick.

I went back inside, grabbed more towels, a blanket, a pillow, put on three pairs of trousers, a few more hoodies, and went back outside.  Then I remembered that some animals are jerks, especially any feral cats who might have been involved in the last chicken flock’s demise, so I grabbed some protective items and went outside.

It was an amazing two hour sleep.  I loved hearing the birds and cocks and bugs didn’t bother me.  I didn’t see any animals come out from under the shed, nor did the cat food get touched, but I did wake up to a beautiful morning at 7:30.

I climbed into bed with my husband and got up shortly afterwards to go to work.

I survived a Saturday at the shop (I say “survived” because it can get crazy-super-busy where I’m trying to deal with multiple customers and phone calls at once) and managed to get some stuff done.  I have even more stuff to do on my three days off, like send updates to my boss, arrange that tacky bar meeting again, prepare a media package for a fundraiser, and I’d REALLY like to order some more merchandise.

But whatever.  My life is really busy but it just feels like I’m going from one exciting thing to another.  Now I am going to go play some pool and have some drinks, maybe convince a special someone to play a board game with me, and hey, maybe a midnight visit to the chickens is in the cards.

Goodnight, fellow cock lovers.

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